Table of Contents
Also on this website:
SPIRITUALITY: The Role of
Gay Identity in the Transformation of Human Consciousness
Things Our Homosexuality Tells Us about the Nature
of God and the Universe
MATTER: updated, revised & expanded edition from Lethe Press
with Afterword by Mark Jordan
LIFE IN PERSPECTIVE: A romance novel set in the 1980s and the 1890s.
THE FOURTH QUILL, a
novel about attitudinal healing and the problem of evil
TWO SPIRITS: A Story of Life with the
Navajo, a collaboration with Walter L. Williams
CHARMED LIVES: Spinning Straw into
Gold: Reclaiming Our Queer Spirituality Through Story
A NOVEL ABOUT HEALING.
Books on Gay Spirituality:
Crane Gay Spirituality Series
Toby's review of Samuel Avery's The
Dimensional Structure of
Coincidence: "Aliens Settle in San
Simple Answer to the Gay Marriage Debate
Why gay people should NOT Marry
Wedding Cake Liberation
Gay Marriage in Texas
Shame on the American People
The "highest form of love"
Second March on
Bifurcation of Gay Spirituality
cause of homosexuality
origins of homophobia
about Jungian ideas in gay consciousness
What is homosexuality?
is Gay Spirituality?
What Jesus said about Gay
Common Experiences Unique to Gay
Is there a "uniquely gay
The purpose of homosexuality
The Reincarnation of Edward
The Gay Succession
Interview on the Nature of
What the Bible Says about
Mesosexual Ideal for Straight Men
of Gay Spirituality
of Gay Liberation Activity
Why Gay Spirituality: Spirituality
as Artistic Medium
Easton Mountain Retreat Center
Andrew Harvey &
Spirituality Summit in May 2004 and
the "Statement of Spirituality"
"It's Always About You"
The myth of the
Joseph Campbell's description of
Avalokiteshvara at the Baths.
Not A Wave
What is Enlightenment?
What is reincarnation?
How many lifetimes in an ego?
Emptiness & Religious Ideas
Experiencing experiencing experiencing
Going into the Light
Meditations for a Funeral
The way to get to heaven
Buddha's father was right
Advice to Travelers to India
The Danda Nata
& goddess Kalika
Nate Berkus is a bodhisattva
John Boswell was Immanuel Kant
The Two Loves
Toby Johnson Believes
The Joseph Campbell Connection
Campbell & The Pre/Trans Fallacy
The Nature of Religion
What's true about
Gay is a Blessing
Drawing Long Straws
Gay Spiritual Functions
The subtle workings of the spirit in gay men's lives.
The Sinfulness of
for a study of gay nondualism
"The Evolution of Gay Identity"
"St. John of the
Dark Night of the Soul."
Let Me Tell You a Secret
Religious Articulations of the
The Collective Unconscious
Driving as Spiritual Practice
Step in Evolution
The Moulting of the Holy Ghost
is a Bodhisattva
The Hero's Journey as archetype
Immaculate Conception & Assumption
Prostitution and the Nature of Evil
Hu: "God is present here"
The Life is in the Blood
retirement and the "freelance monastery"
Seeing with Different Eyes
experience at the Servites' Castle in Riverside
Great Dance according to C.S.Lewis
The Techniques Of The World Saviors
Part 1: Brer Rabbit and the
Part 2: The
Part 3: Jesus
and the Resurrection
Part 4: A
Course in Miracles
Secret of the Clear Light
Understanding the Clear Light
Souls Get Reincarnated
In honor of Sir Arthur C Clarke
Karellen was a homosexual
About Alien Abduction
are you looking for in a gay science fiction novel?
about Gay Mental Health
Ideas for gay
Kip and Toby,
and nicknamesake Toby Marotta.
Harry Hay, Founder of the gay movement
About Hay and The New Myth
About Karl Heinrich Ulrichs, the first
man to really "come out"
Michael Talbot, gay mystic
About Fr. Bernard Lynch
About Richard Baltzell
About Guy Mannheimer
About David Weyrauch
About Dennis Paddie
About Ask the Fire
About Arthur Evans
About Christopher Larkin
About Sterling Houston
About Michael Stevens
Our friend Tom Nash
Be Done on Earth
by Howard E. Cook
Pay Me What I'm Worth by
The Way Out by Christopher
The Gay Disciple by John Henson
Art That Dares by Kittredge Cherry
Coming Out, Coming Home by Kennth
the Light by B. Alan Bourgeois
Over Coffee: A conversation For Gay
Partnership & Conservative Faith by D.a. Thompson
Dark Knowledge by
Janet Planet by Eleanor
Kairos by Paul E. Hartman
with Jesus by D.K.Maylor
Kali Rising by Rudolph
Missing Myth by Gilles Herrada
Secret of the Second Coming by Howard E. Cook
The Scar Letters: A Novel
by Richard Alther
Future is Queer by Labonte & Schimel
by Charlene Spretnak
Spirituality 101 by Joe Perez
Cut Hand: A
Nineteeth Century Love Story on the American Frontier by Mark Wildyr
by Eleanor Lerman
Rizzoli by Felice Picano
to Unlocking the Closet Door by Chelsea Griffo
The Door of the
Heart by Diana Finfrock Farrar
by David Duncan
and Demion by Mel White
Gay Men and The New Way Forward by Raymond L.
Dimensional Stucture of Consciousness by Samuel Avery
Manly Pursuit of Desire and Love by Perry Brass
Guy Mannheimer was Toby Johnson's first lover.
They met at a Gay/Straight Men's Gathering in San Francisco in Spring
1972 co-sponsored by Gay-Rap.
Guy was living in Menlo Park, CA at that time. He and about 6 other
people, gay and straight, were living in a house--called Werder
House (2100 Santa Cruz Ave. 94025)--that had previously been the home
members of The Grateful
Dead. Toby used to hitchhike down the Pennisula to see Guy.
(Here's a link to a story about the house and the Grateful Dead: jerrygarciasbrokendownpalaces.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-chateau-2100-santa-cruz-avenue.html)
That next summer Toby was on staff at the Mann Ranch Seminars (see The Joseph Campbell
Connection). About halfway through the summer, Guy joined him, and
then remained on staff for the next three years. (Also on staff in
those days was a wonderful woman named Marty Kent Jones.)
Mann Ranch Staff 1973 (?)
Guy on the left, then Toby, then Geri Olson, below Nina Winter, then Janice.
(The long haired blonde woman is Janice McHugh, a
Canadian "undocumented alien"
living as a "hippie-chick" in San Francisco, who'd come to live in
Toby's household on Arguello Street. We were dear friends.)
In 1973, partly because their friend Peter Goldblum was teaching in the
training program--and partly because Toby had met Terry Carlson who was
then working as a Psych Tech at Mt Zion Hospital Crisis Clinic and
convinced him that was a good job--Toby and Guy moved to Napa and
trained to become Licensed Psychiatric Technicians at Napa State
In 1975 they returned to San Francisco, living in an apartment on 18th
Street, between Noe and Sanchez, just down the block from the center of
the Castro District. Toby got a job--as hoped for--at Mt Zion. Guy had
found psychiatric nursing to be uncomfortable, and declined to follow
that vocation track. During that time Guy discovered BAGL, Bay Area Gay
Liberation, and then got Toby interested also. It was that involvement
that indirectly led to Toby's work at the Tenderloin Clinic and the D.A.F.O.D.I.L. Alliance
(perhaps the most important thing Toby Johnson actually ever did to
affect the course of gay history).
After about six months, Toby and Guy parted amicably, though not
without pain. They remained friends.
In the late 70s, Guy became partners with Dan Hampshire. They lived
together until Guy's death from AIDS in 1989.
Guy was a second generation Holocaust survivor. He'd been born in a
displaced persons camp in Switzerland. His father, an attorney, had
returned to Germany to help other Jews get out of the country; he was
arrested and died subsequently at Auschwitz. Guy's mother, Rita,
remained in Switzerland with her two children. After the war, she moved
to New York City where Guy grew up.
Guy's whole life was colored by her experience of losing everything. It
tormented him AND it made him especially sensitive to others' suffering.
Guy in long johns bottoms,
400 Coombs St, Napa CA 1974
When Guy and Toby met, Guy was in growth-oriented psychotherapy with
famed gay psychologist Don Clark. Clark was an important influence in
both their lives.
in the 1970s, Guy studied calligraphy with an old Jewish wiseman in San
Francisco. As an exercise he produced a sampler with a quote from EM
Forster. Though the wording is slightly off, it's a wonderful quote.
Toby Johnson used Guy's sampler as a frontispiece for his novel Secret Matter
Guy was surely an example of that
aristocracy: sensitive, considerate and plucky.
Guy attended the First Radical Faerie Gathering in 1979.
Here he is in the famous photo of the mud ritual circle.**
I can tell it is he because he is wearing glasses. Guy was very
dependent on his thick glasses.
We'd broken up a couple of years before and weren't seeing each other
at that time.
(I see that is partly why I was not at that Gathering--too bad!)
Here's the panel for Guy in the AIDS Quilt.
Note the pink triangle and yellow triangle combined to form a Mogen
**About the Mud Ritual:
When I was in seminary as a
Servite in Chicago—at Catholic Theological Union on the periphery of
the Univ of Chicago Divinity School—I was the “house liturgist” and
composed a number of modernized rituals over the course of a year.
One of my classmates wrote me a couple of years ago saying he still
remembered the Ash Wednesday ritual. Instead of having a single priest
put the ashes on everybody’s forehead, we all gave ashes to one another
in the congregation (it was a group of about 15 or so), then we said
the Miserere (Ps 51) and offered one another forgiveness and absolution.
THEN we did a second round with the ashes, but this time it was to wash
the ashes off each other's forehead with white wash clothes in glass
bowls of warm perfumed water. (And maybe recited Jesus’s instructions
about washing your face and not showing your religious devotion openly.)
One of the major events of that First Radical Faerie
Gathering in 1978 was the mud ritual in which everybody got covered
with mud by one another, then they washed/scraped it off each other--in
Harry Hay's famous expression: “scraping off the ugly green frog skins”
of normality and pretense.
There weren't any white washclothes at the Faerie Gathering, but, ah,
for me, it is like an echo of the Servite ritual from 1969. Neat!
Guy organized a group of his, mostly Jewish, friends to celebrate an obscure holiday on Wednesday morning, April 8, 1981.
Birkat Hachama (ברכת החמה, "Blessing of the Sun") refers
to a rare Jewish blessing that is recited to the Creator, thanking Him
for creating the sun. The blessing is recited when the sun completes
its cycle every 28 years on a Tuesday at sundown. Jewish tradition says
that when the Sun completes this cycle, it has returned to its position
when the world was created. Because the blessing needs to be said when
the sun is visible, the blessing is postponed to the following day, on
Wednesday morning. (from Wikipedia entry)
We climbed up to Corona Heights Park, a rocky crag above the Castro
neighborhood, for sunrise. Here are three photos from that event. Guy
is in the middle of the circle with the colorful knit cap and blue
nylon quilted jacket. It was cold. I'm in the top two, so somebody else
must have been taking the photos.
I recognize (I think) Hal Offen (3rd from right in washed blue
jean jacket with wool collar), Larry Wisch, Dan Hampshire, David Axel,
Ira Rudolph, Sam Blazer, Andy Rose, Guy Mannheimer, myself (in red
frame glasses that have turned dark in the sunlight). I'm sorry to
admit I don't recognize any of the women (and interesting that I am on
the women's side of the circle).
About Esther Bell:
One evening in
1975, Guy and I had gone
to a movie in the area of San Francisco called North Beach. It was cold
and dark when we got out. We went down to the corner to wait for a bus.
Already at the bus stop was a very old lady. She immediately engaged us
in conversation, and then when the bus arrived asked for our help to
get her up the steps. She had severe emphysema.
Over the next year, Guy and I became
friends and occasional caretakers of the old lady. And after Guy and I
broke up, I took over the job on my own. My oversight of her lasted
about three years, after which her relatives had her put in a nursing
home where she subsequently died, probably at age 90 or so.
Her name was Esther Bell. She
entertained us with stories of her life. As a young woman, she'd been
the jewelry and high couture buyer for I. Magnin's Department Store inn
downtown San Francisco. She told how she regularly sailed on the Queen
Mary steamship from New York to Marseilles to travel to Paris to seek
out upscale merchandise. Occasionally she travelled with Mr. Magnin
Esther also produced a line of her
jewelry, under the name Estabel.
She gave us some of her pieces (which
unfortunately were later lost in a robbery of my home).
Most of the Estabel line was broaches --
most with a floral theme or insect theme: enamel pansies, for instance,
and painted or enameled wasps.
Meeting Esther Bell was one of the
highlights of our lives in San Francisco in those days.